November 19, 2010

Beer with Breakfast? Now You Can, with Miller’s Kick-Save Crunch!

Buffalo Sabre, Vezina Trophy-winner, and, yes, even philanthropist Ryan Miller is arguably the best goalie in the game. Granted he’s on a bad team right now, but he can still snag pucks out of the air as if there were no tomorrow, and, as this video shows, he’s even pretty proficient with his stick (who really likes photographers, anyway?)... and, yet, ever the mind-boggling conundrum, no one has ever thought to give him his own cereal. Until now.



"Kick-Save? More like Kick-Ass!"
Thanks to PLB Sports, Miller fans in the Buffalo area  (or fans online at plbsports.com) can now enjoy drinking from a frosted mug and looking at his each and every morning, all the while eating spoonfuls of Kick-Save Crunch, which are advertised as: “a honey nut toasted oat cereal” with a portion of the proceeds set to benefit “The Steadfast Foundation, a non-profit foundation started by Miller to support and provide resources to children and their families who are fighting cancer.”

Of course, it’s important to note that PLB Sports is also the mastermind behind Ochocinco’s, the cereal named after the Cincinnati Bengals’ wide receiver of incredibly the same legal name. That in turn conjures up memories from last September when a simple typo mistakenly directed the well-intentioned, charitable people that bought his cereal to a phone-sex line instead of Feed The Children. A misprint on the box got the prefix of the telephone number to that non-profit organization wrong. As a result, those very same well-intentioned, charitable people were essentially put in a position to supply their credit-card information not to give a donation, but in exchange for another service entirely.

There were clearly several eye-opening details surrounding this story, most notably the inherent lack of due diligence on the part of whoever was responsible for checking the phone number. Clearly an example of someone being caught with their pants down. However, there’s also the fact that Ochocinco has his own cereal?! Needless to say, Miller doesn’t need to be lumped in with him or tarnish his family-friendly image anywhere near the point Ochocinco had his... even before the cereal incident. As such, I’m guessing actually promoting the cereal as a great on-the-side to a morning brew was never a realistic possibility. A shame. No one’s ever really cornered the ever-popular yet grossly undertargeted beer-just-when-you-wake-up segment before.

Assuming all the dots on the “i”s and crosses on the “t”s are checked properly, it’s a safe bet that this clear-cut Honey Nut Cheerios rip-off does stand to do a lot of good for children in need, even if jokes on the money to be donated and just “giving it away” are inevitable well into the foreseeable future. Good on Miller. If only he could coax teammate Thomas Vanek into doing similarly. He doesn’t even need a cereal, just the $4 million or so he doesn’t earn every year and a chequebook.

"How about Million-Dollar Zeros? That could work as a cereal, right?"

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