Islanders just too much for Flyers... for about 36 Seconds

We won't get into how, technically, the Islanders' second goal on Sunday shouldn't have counted because of the referee's incompetence in whistling the play dead earlier than it took the team to hire Garth Snow after replacing Neil Smith as general manager four years ago (and that was pretty early on in their search for a replacement for Smith; hell, it was pretty early on in their search for a replacement for Mike Milbury). For all intents and purposes it was a goal, and even if the ref intended on blowing the whistle a few milliseconds before the puck reached Philadelphia Flyers goalie Sergei Bobrovsky (meaning the play should have been dead at that point, when he intended to blow it, down on his knees and all), it was nice to see the Islanders get a call just one time, because God knows they needed it, and a few hundred others up to this point this season.

I mean, you can kind of see how the ref would assume that Bobrovsky would make the save on Frans Nielsen. For one, it was a routine save. For another, it was just 30 seconds after the previous goal, meaning a goal being scored was doubly unlikely. Finally, it was the freakin' Islanders!

Still, however nice it was to see the Islanders get a break, the Flyers responded with two quick ones of their own against Islanders goalie Dwayne Roloson to turn a 2-1 deficit into a 3-2 victory, bringing into question the very questionable goaltending situation on the island.

By far, Roloson has the better numbers between him and Rick DiPietro. Roloson has a decent 2.50 goals-against average, compared to DiPietro's horrid 3.76. Roloson's .913 save percentage also easily trumps DiPietro's .874 (of course, no offense to Roloson, but so would my grandmother's .895 in her senior league). Roloson even has one assist to DiPietro's none, and, somehow has compiled two less penalties in minutes. Evidently, DiPietro got the extra penalty, two minutes for unsportsmanlike conduct, after throwing a tantrum upon realizing that the local hospital he frequents stopped serving his favourite flavour of Jell-O at lunch. He's clearly due for a return visit after playing through a third of the season unscathed.

Oddly enough, however, Roloson can't seem to win as often as DiPietro. The loss yesterday was Roloson's 11th, to go along with two wins and one overtime loss. DiPietro meanwhile has a 3-4-4 record. As such, it begs the question: does head-coach Jack Capuano go with the goalie that gives his team the best chance at winning, or the goalie that actually wins, although "wins" is used very loosely here. It would probably be more accurate to say "loses less". It's a fair question, but one that doesn't have a relevant answer.. the Islanders are screwed no matter what. Even once the likes of legitimate talents Kyle Okposo and Mark Streit get healthy, the Islanders will find themselves way out of playoff contention, and attention must turn to next year already. Hardly the kind of mindset you want your team to have in early December, but one that is unavoidable with the team already 16 points out of the last playoff spot in the Eastern conference.

For the record, the two goals were not the fastest in Islanders history, with the team actually scoring five in a mere 2:37 in a January 1982 game against the Pittsburgh Penguins. Among those were goals 16 seconds apart care of John Tonelli and Bryan Trottier. How depressing it must be to realize that even when this edition of the Islanders does something right, they're still so far away from matching the success of the team during its dynasty years. I wonder what Billy Smith is up to these days.

Price Lives up to the Hype as Fleury Wilts like a Flower

It would seem proving everyone wrong isn’t good enough for Montreal Canadiens goalie Carey Price. Now he has to rub it in our faces too.

"That was then. Now I only hang out with women dressed up sexily like angels!"

Indeed, as of Monday, Price leads all goalies in voting for the upcoming edition of the all-star game, as if to say “Nyah, nyah, nyah, nyah, nyah”. Real mature, buddy. As if co-leading the league in wins (12) and shutouts (4) wasn’t enough of a vindication for the apparently reformed party animal. Now he gets the smug satisfaction of knowing the fans are on his side as well.

Of course, it remains to be seen how long things will stay as they are with the Habs’ faithful traditionally being as fickle as a horny teenager forced to choose between his girlfriend and that one sexy classmate in second-period English who’s been known to play fast and loose with social conventions of monogamy. It’s just really hard to choose. On one hand, it’s your girlfriend, with whom you’ve been through thick and thin, and, on the other, you get real weird feelings down there whenever you’re around Jimmy... but I guess college is really when you ought to be experimenting. Right now, stick with what’s safe.

And, in the end, Canadiens fans, deep down, anyway... really deep down, are guilty of doing just that. I mean look back to when they tried to stuff the ballot box two seasons ago and Mike Komisarek ended up a starter, which could really only have been the byproduct of some Make a Wish Foundation initiative to grant a mediocre hockey player the chance to see for one game what it’s like to actually be worthy of a five-year, $22.5-million contract (and then Brian Burke went and spoiled it all).

Really, hockey fans in general are insanely loyal and proof this year comes in the form of New York Islanders defenseman Mark Streit getting 2500 votes, despite being injured. Perhaps more outrageous? San Jose Sharks goalie Antti Niemi earning 18,695 votes despite doing his best to play dead in the crease on the odd occasion coach Todd McLellan goes against his better judgment and gives him another chance. Marc-Andre Fleury is actually in fifth place among goalies with 44,111 votes, causing speculation that maybe Pittsburgh Penguins fans are united in the belief that him giving up 20 goals in one period might actually do wonders for his game, which has actually been soooo awesome that it’s sparked the invention of the term “six hole” for the one between his ears.

These atrocities aside, sometimes the fans do get it right and Price’s 71,199 votes are proof of that. So, which other goalies actually belong in the all-star game (with votes or not)?

In the East:

Tim Thomas (BOS): The Boston Bruins may not have needed their back-up from last year to be this good, but with him leading goalies in three of the four main statistical categories they also need not complain all the same. Thomas has redeemed himself to the point that referring to him as Mr. Zero has become a sign of respect and no longer a shameful nod to the excess digits in his five-year, $20-million contract.

Sergei Bobrovsky (PHI): Everyone knows the Philadelphia Flyers are a good team, but no one knew they had a good goaltender in Bobrovsky. Hell, few even knew who Bobrovsky was, but he’s proven himself capable of being a bona-fide number-one starter in the NHL to the point that his team can only be considered a legitimate Stanley Cup contender and no longer the joke players tell each other behind the Flyers’ backs for fear of getting beat up (because they’re still big and mean-looking, no matter how many goals they let in).

In the West:

Jonathan Quick (LA): “White Chocolate” Quick as he’s been dubbed (by yours truly; it’s going to catch on, just you wait) has proven that last season, during which he posted 39 wins, was no fluke. While he does have the benefit of a strong team in front him (like Bobrovsky and Thomas), one has to assume he’s at least in part responsible for the Los Angeles Kings’ 13-7 record.

Jaroslav Halak (STL): He has stumbled lately, but if he can pull it together again and improve his stats enough to justify a spot, a period pitting him against Price would be something hockey fans would likely pay to witness, let alone actually take the two seconds needed to turn on the television to tune in at home. Make it happen NHL. Even if you have to rig the entire voting process and so-called draft.

Mathieu Garon (CLB): He may have only appeared in seven games with the Columbus Blue Jackets, but in principle Garon deserves to be in the game as much as anybody (only seven goals allowed in those seven games). He has three shutouts, a 1.08 goals-against average, and a .960 save percentage. What will likely keep him out of the game is the fact that he doesn’t seem to have gotten any votes at all (or not enough to justify the Herculean effort needed to add him at the end of the list at NHL.com)... that and the league will likely not want to draw attention to that fact and the indisputable evidence that there, really, are no hockey fans in Columbus.

"It's not that no one voted for me; It's that no one in Columbus voted for me. Man, my wife lives here!"

Honourable mentions go to Washington Capital Michal Neuvirth, Phoenix Coyote Ilya Bryzgalov, Detroit Red Wing Jimmy Howard, New Jersey Devil Martin Brodeur (for a brilliant career that’s likely done, or should be after this year), and Fleury for bringing a smile to everyone’s faces, because shouldn’t the all-star game be about having fun (41000 votes? Really?)!

The Top Five Surprises of this Young NHL Season

Obviously, these storylines are about as likely to change as the Toronto Maple Leafs fortunes so far this season (#2), but that doesn’t make them any less fun to read about. Take for example number five, which reads like a success story but is most likely to derail into one of an ended career burst aflame like a $2-million mansion for the insurance money, once its owners realize that the housing market was as much a fad as Britney Spears, Crocs, and New Jersey Devil Ilya Kovalchuk’s wanting-to-go-to-Russia phase. But I digress...

5) Anthony Stewart: The Atlanta Thrashers have somehow, at least temporarily, managed to find the talent in this one-time promising Florida Panthers prospect turned preyed-upon deer carcass by the roadside. Apparently there was something there after all, with Stewart scoring his first-ever NHL hat trick on October 15 against the Anaheim Ducks. What’s most impressive is that before this season he only had four goals total scattered throughout a total of 105 games in parts of four previous seasons in the NHL. Therefore, the real surprise is not necessarily his four goals in five games... it’s the fact that he made the team in the first place.

4) Ondrej Pavelec collapsing: Sticking with the same team, goaltender Ondrej Pavelec suffered a fainting spell in the Thrashers’ first game against the Washington Capitals. No one was near him on the ice at the time, giving the incident an eery air of mystery. There’s nothing funny here, except for the fact that he must have had a premonition that the Thrashers would actually win that game (4-2) and got so shocked he got a little too lightheaded. Thankfully, he’s okay now, at least okay enough that we can joke about it. He’s rejoined the Thrashers, but his teammates aren’t letting him in on the fact fact that they actually have a winning record for obvious reasons.

3) The Philadelphia Flyers and their goaltending situation: We all knew it was bad, but to hand the starting job to an unknown Sergei Bobrovsky over Brian Boucher, once Michael Leighton went down with injury? Really? The plan has admittedly been somewhat successful, with Bobrovsky currently 2-1, but that lasting is about as likely as defenseman Chris Pronger ever getting his hands on the Lady Byng Memorial Trophy, any way short of knocking out Detroit Red Wing with a clothesline and stealing it from his that is. Datsyuk earning a Gordie Howe hat trick against the Anaheim Ducks a while back just narrowly missed our list.

2) The Toronto Maple Leafs and their quick start: It’s actually their quickest start since the 1993-94 season, during which they won their first 10. Nobody is predicting the Leafs to stay undefeated during regulation the rest of the season, right now at 4-0-1, but credit is definitely due their way after it took them eight games to earn their first win last year. Are the Leafs for real? Well, let me answer that question with another: Do pigs fly? Do flying pigs eat bacon all the while flying around in this little fantasy world made up of sunshine, lollipops, and gumdrops? Technically that’s two questions, but I think I made my point.

1) Marian Gaborik getting injured: just kidding. Really, goalie Tim Thomas regaining his number-one spot with the Boston Bruins: It’s still early in the year and anything can happen, but it looks as if either the hip surgery he had last off-season has really helped or Tuukka “Two ‘U’s, Two ‘K’s, Two Points” Rask has lost head coach Claude Julien’s confidence and is poised to suffer through a sophomore slump after allowing four goals in the team’s first game. Thomas has conversely allowed just one goal in two games played. Whatever happens, it’s clear that the Bruins have great depth and either goalie makes for a very risky choice in your fantasy pool, whether you’re a Bruins fan or not. I think that would be akin to Torontonians snatching up Clarke MacArthur, ignorant to the fact that his early-season scoring binge can’t possibly last.

"I'm back, baby!"